How We Use Our Calendar System (And Why It Actually Works)

Our first calendar was created years ago to help Beckham when we couldn't find a visual calendar that was functional and pretty. He was nonspeaking for years and we needed a system he could physically see and use in our home. He did later learn to communicate, but we also had more kids and were being asked the same questions on repeat. When are we going to the movie? When is my party? What days do I go to school? When will I see Grandma?

We solved a lot of those frustrations by building up our own tried and true calendar system. Our family is anxious by nature, so being able to quickly glance at a calendar on the wall has been a game changer, not just for Beckham but for every family member. We knew it needed to be in a high traffic area or it wouldn't be nearly as effective. And it needed to look good enough that we'd actually want it on the wall.

Our system is simple but very effective if you can stay as consistent as possible. Some days we're more consistent than others, and we try not to feel guilty for the days we weren't. We didn't want it to become another thing we couldn't keep up with, a visual reminder of failure sitting on the wall. Don't overcomplicate it. Keep it simple. Small changes have made a huge impact.

Here is how we suggest using them:

1. A few days before the new month, we walk through our schedule together. Our kids put their activity clings on the calendar themselves. We've found it's important for them to be part of the process. It doesn't always look perfectly lined up, but that's okay. Walking through changes to their typical day to day schedule and giving them a chance to process those changes has helped us avoid so many hard moments.
2. We use wet erase markers and assign each person in the family a color. We draw small circles with that color on the clings for the appropriate family member. Some clings end up with two or three colored dots on them.
3. Every Sunday night we try to spend 30 to 60 minutes reviewing the upcoming week and talking through what we're excited or nervous about. We're members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and were encouraged by Elder Ballard to hold family councils. We've written about how we run ours and what questions we use here.

There are a hundred different ways you could use these in your own family and we can't wait to see your creativity. Tag us on Instagram @fernfamilyco so we can see how they work for you.